I am angry with you! I shouted heavenwards at God with all the emotions of talking to an ordinary human being walking next to me. I was too angry to even care about lightning bolts that could strike me for daring to question the providence of God. (Do not worry, I have since repented).

That was some four and a half years ago when I had looked up at the brilliant skies on a usually wintery day with tears running down my cheeks as I went on a walk during my lunch break to lament my changed life.

I had recently immigrated to another part of the world, but my life looked nothing like what it used to be. I struggled to accept all the ways I was outside my comfort zone.

This journey seemed to have been the hardest one that I had made with my husband. Other times, I reinvented myself and adjusted my skills to suit the context. But this time I had several other changes I was contending with. They included a season of empty nesting and a midlife crisis. Yes, this journey intersected with too many new experiences. I was overwhelmed. I felt that I had not packed well for this journey overseas. You know what I mean. Yes, that time back in high school when you were ill-prepared and packed your backpack with your Thursday textbooks for your Friday classes. That is how it was for me.

I Found My Big Girl Pants!

Needless to say, I was stuck until I finally decide to stop whining and start digging through my backpack for the resources. The fact is, there was nowhere to stop along this journey. Life was moving along. I had to keep up. At the bottom of my backpack, I found some buried dreams that have since been dusted off and tried in a new context. God had brought me to this place for a purpose. I had to discover what that was. Since I did not want to miss my kairos, I called on God for His divine help. I also began using the metaphoric dirt of despair piled high on me as a stepping stone to my destiny.

What does your present journey look like?

This experience may not be yours, but maybe it’s the experience of a friend or loved one.

• Whether it is yours or someone else’ let us reflect on it:

• Is it an actual location change or a season of unforeseen events?

• Are you experiencing a season of sickness or contending with that of a loved one?

• Is it a season of changes in your career or a breakdown of a relationship?

• Is it that you are experiencing difficulties in a new stage of life -- maybe it is your first attempt at adulting or embarking on midlife?

• Whatever it is, how are you coping? And what is in your backpack to help you get through your journey?

The experience in my new home country continues to unravel in a new and strangely beautiful way. No, that does not mean that all difficulties have disappeared. However, I am now better equipped to face the challenges. My backpack now has the right tools to assist me in powering through rough days. I have become more resilient and focused on creating my path using God-given talents. All the discomfort I experienced was pushing me into a delivery room where I could give birth to dreams that I thought would never be realized. I have grown in leaps and bounds. My gratitude, my trust in the providence of God, my intentionality in self-care, and in owning and honing my skills have grown at a supersonic rate. These tools make the journey easier each day.

I see now that sometimes we need to leave our comfort zone to discover the stuff that makes us who we are. What I was interpreting as a dimming of light turned out to be a spotlight on the places that did not get a chance to unfold. By the grace of God and His leading, I am determined to shine!

I am looking forward to hearing about your journey!